A TANGLE OF LIGHT

 A TANGLE OF LIGHT By Tessa Harvey     Adrienne gulped the last of her drink, scraped back on her chair deliberately, knowing how much that had annoyed her mother. Her face was bitter and angry, her eyes stormy and grey.     "Why should I give you a chance? Who ever gives second chances?" "God does," was the quiet reply.     "Oh, how convenient. Let's have God now and all be perfect." She swayed on her feet, suddenly exhausted. Her mother helped her to her room and Adrienne lay on the familiar bed in the pretty room she had once thought a prison.     Exhausted, she fell asleep in seconds. Her mother watched her for a while, saw how the girl's face softened in sleep, becoming an older version of the child she had allowed to drift away, to neglect. How cruel had she been.     She went quietly out of the door and reached for her neglected Bible. Perhaps God would make a way where there seemed to be no way - heal her own mother's heart ...

A TANGLE OF LIGHT   By Tessa Harvey     "I never knew who your dad was. It was one night returning from the hospital to the Nurses' Home. The shift had been longer than usual. Several desperate emergencies. A little girl with a savage dog bite. The finger could be saved, the bones would heal, but the father, an arrogant paramedic claimed it was the child's own fault. He delayed getting treatment too long."     She paused, remembering. "But, mum, that's sad and I do care, but you loved me once. Was it because I became a teenager? Was I so very ugly?"     Annabelle was horrified. "No, of course not - it's just I became afraid. You wanted to be a nurse, and I thought what happened to me would happen to you. "Your dad was not kind, abusive really. But I didn't talk to you. I tried, but it was easier to drift away. Will you forgive, try and understand. Give me another chance."

A TANGLE OF LIGHT  By Tessa Harvey     Adrienne walked away from the hospital. It was a beautiful day. Blue sky etched the red colours of a small perfect maple, the cherry tree leaves sang a symphony of gold, orange and green whispering in the wind. The cold was sharpening. Adee wondered what to do. The man she had known as dad was leaving. It was hard, though he had rarely been kind.     Somehow she had never quite measured up. Not clever enough or pretty enough, shy rather than assertive. Her shoulders sagged.     Despite feeling the Presence of God in her nan's hospital room, smelling that beautiful perfume from heaven, she still felt sad.     Gran wasn't yet out of danger, though there was hope now. Then arms wrapped around her, and she startled, dark hair flying, eyes widening in dismay. Oh God, not Jono.     It was her mother. "What's wrong?" Adee snapped gracelessly. "Now you're alone, I guess suddenly you want a daughter. We...

A TANGLE OF LIGHT  By Tessa Harvey          There was a loud knock at the door. Saxon opened it, curious;  ready to push back any unwelcome intruder.      A smiling man stood there, holding a big box of groceries and an envelope. He was young, his face seemed to shine. There was an aura around him, a Presence stood with him.     Amor and Saxon just stared. The man caught sight of the broken mug, the blood, the tears...     "it's you," the older man Saxon exclaimed. "You came back!" The man looked puzzled, but then smiled again.     "You came up for prayer and signed a form accepting the Lord Jesus Christ. There were many such decisions, but God told me to come to you." He placed the groceries on a table, then pulled another basket from behind him. In it were coffee, tea, Milo and two identical beautiful mugs. "Jesus loves you," they proclaimed.     "When are your twins due, if you don't mind me ask...

A TANGLE OF LIGHT   By Tessa Harvey         Saxon   drew her back to the present. "Amor, we went past this dumb-looking church, but the singing stopped us. The words were unknown to us, there were no instruments, the harmonies were awesome, rising and falling. My mates were awe-struck too but wanted a drink.     As he spoke, Amor sank down on their little two-seater couch. It was shabby, as was everything else. No matter how hard she worked, there was never enough money.     Saxon was on a disability pension because of his traumatic early life, but claimed he needed drugs and drink to help cope - and other women, she thought angrily.     "Look," she rose up, tall in her nurse's uniform, "I am leaving tomorrow. My sister and partner have offered me a home after...." She bit her lip, aware she had said too much.     "No!" A tall thin man, already greying, Saxon grabbed her hands, accidentally knocking over Amor's ...

A TANGLE OF LIGHT  By Tessa Harvey     Gently he wrapped his strong arm around her shoulder and guided her through the screen door into the warmth of their tiny lounge room.     "Not a woman, no," Saxon smiled, "a great man! A preacher!" "But you hate preachers!" Often Saxon had told her of the day a minister came to see the family. Saxon had been eight years old. The little boy's eyes had lit up - someone to kick a soccer ball around with, a new dad maybe. His mum said the other one had gone "visiting."          But the preacher man had taken one look at the tall grassy unkempt yard, at the old nan trying to make a garden and said: "my word, your nan needs help - a lot of help!"     His car reversed swiftly and he was gone.     Day after day Saxon watched and waited, a little boy's hope and fate hanging in the balance. Then one day, there was one piece of bread left. The new twins were crying. His big sister was hun...

A TANGLE OF LIGHT  By Tessa Harvey          Then she looked at the "dead" woman. Her eyes widened. "The doctor has already signed your death certificate. He never makes mistakes!"     That night the nurse, whose name was Amor went out on her small back deck and looked at the stars. She recalled the beautiful smell in that hospital room when there previously had only been death. It was heavenly, like the most beautiful of roses but more precious.     Death meant nothing to her. She was having an abortion tomorrow anyway. No intruder was marring her perfect body. Then she recalled an old story of a young woman whose body had also been "marred." Her son was called Jesus. Had He really been scarred for her also? Had He really risen from death?     "God," she whispered, " if you are real, show me!"     The night wind stirred. That was all. She turned to go inside and banged into her partner. "I suppose you have been out dr...

A TANGLE OF LIGHT  By Tessa Harvey     Ava leaned against the sky. She thought "I am dying." She felt a deep sense of loss. What have I ever done, she thought, that meant anything. I have worked in a store - that was good. My husband was once a good man, but I forgot how to really talk. Did God matter after all? Where am I going?     "Oh my God," people said hundreds of times a day, but it meant nothing. They did not believe in an after life. God was foolish superstition. Why then were there horoscopes, ouija boards, star signs, crystals telling about your birth? Occult groups - who could see the truth?     How foolish I have been. God, give me another chance. She heard Damien praying, Adrienne crying....     Her eyes opened. She gasped for breath. "You came back, Mum," whispered Annabelle. Tears pooled in Ava's eyes.     Belle hadn't called her mum since she was ten. A nurse came into the room. She looked angry and miserable and sa...

A TANGLE OF LIGHT By Tessa Harvey     Adrienne wondered why and when she had suddenly grown up. Silly things like how many "likes" you had, how many "air" friends, resting in clouds, silly young men with drugs in one hand and a dog leash in the other. They all seemed surreal, immaterial, transient.     Why had she thought so much of a thug, for that is how she now saw Jonathan Carter? Why had she been so blind? Somehow Adrienne had always known Jack was not her father. He shared nothing familiar, neither books, nor gestures, nor thoughts. He was an outsider looking in, pretending he saw the windows of her heart, but Jack saw nothing, only himself reflected in all he owned.     And she had befriended a man like Jack, like the one Elsie had chosen. Was it a bondage to the familiar? She felt lost and confused.     Her mother had cared for her, she remembered, but then had been more and more absent emotionally. She thought of her beautiful grandfather...

A TANGLE OF LIGHT   By Tessa Harvey           "I   need to know who you all are." His voice sounded gravelly, but authoritative.          Damien stepped forward. "I am Damien Blackburn. My wife is in your care, Annabelle here is my daughter, Adrienne my granddaughter and Elsie Hopper a close family friend.     The surgeon nodded to each in turn. "Your wife, Ava is still alive. We have performed open heart surgery to bypass a blockage caused by atherosclerosis. She has had to have a heart valve replacement. At present, we are hopeful. If you are Christians, pray; if not, try to be positive and hopeful."      There was a stunned silence. Everyone seemed not to be breathing. Distant hospital sounds faded. Personal issues, resentments - all had no place here. Life hung in the balance.   The surgeon turned. "I have to go."    

A TANGLE OF LIGHT  By Tessa Harvey     The silly senile old duffer in the corner stood up. "Adrienne has got family. I happen to know her father actually is."     Jono looked taken aback, but quickly recovered. "Come on, Adrienne. No one keeps me waiting. Do you know who I am? The mayor's son, that's me!" He puffed his chest out. "So get back in your walker, old lady."     Elsie stood up to him. Inwardly she was trembling, but God moved Goliaths. God moved mountains. God, her God was King of Kings and Lord of Lords.     The door opened. The surgeon strode in, stripping off his gloves. He looked weary, beyond tiredness, his face grave.

A TANGLE OF LIGHT   By Tessa Harvey     There was a water dispenser and plastic cups, or rather thick paper cups stacked close.     A well dressed very handsome young man entered. His black hair was slicked back. He walked over to Adrienne with a proprietal air. "Hey A.D. You ready to come now?" He leaned low and whispered, "Got some more happy pills just for you, honey. I am all you need."     Seeing the old lady seated nearby with her lined face and scuffed shoes, he assumed she was pretty dumb and a bit past-it. Elsie was not.     Adrienne hesitated. "My nana is very sick. I can't leave."     The boy sneered. "Oh yeah? You don't even know they are your relatives. You texted me, told me all the lies you grew up believing. Come on, kid, I'm your man. I take care of my own."     Still Adrienne lingered. He grabbed her arm with a bruising grip. Jono did not want opposition. Isolation and compliance were his goals.